How’s your inner mean person today? You know, the one who doesn’t say very nice things to you.
Chances are, they were up nice and early this morning, harping in your ear about everything you were doing wrong and had nothing nice to say about what you were doing right.
Our self talk is meaner to us more than anyone else could possibly be….and the meaner we are to ourselves, the meaner other people are to us.
Like attracts like. So, how can we change this.
Listen to yourself
Really listen to what you are saying to yourself in your head. Would you dare say that to another person? Most likely not.
Write down what you say to yourself
Writing things down with a pen and paper creates a connection with what is being written. Read it out loud. Would you like someone else saying those things to you? Most likely not.
Catch yourself when you say these things and actively stop it. Consciously tell your inner voice that you won’t put up with talking to yourself like that and tell it to go away. Immediately compliment yourself on something and smile. Feel how good it feels to say something nice to yourself.
Look at yourself in the mirror and say nice things to yourself
It is amazing how difficult this is for most people. We want everyone else to like us so why don’t we like ourselves?
Start by standing in front of the mirror everyday and compliment yourself about the nice things you see.
‘I like your smile.’ ‘I like your hair.’ ‘I like your eyelashes.’ If you find it tough, start off with something small. Have fun with it. Let your fun sense of humour shine through.
Even if you’re just passing by a mirror, look in it and wink at yourself. Say something nice to yourself about yourself.
When you’re ready, start adding your name to the beginning of each compliment and eventually, change the word ‘like’ to ‘love’.
It takes at least 30 days to reprogram the brain so don’t put too much pressure on yourself to rush through this process. Work through it at your own pace. You’ll know when you’re ready to take the next step. The secret is to do it every day, as often as possible. Do it every time you’re near a mirror.
What we see in others is a reflection of ourselves
This works both ways. If something about someone else bothers you, it means you have that trait, too and it’s time to take a look inside.
However, if you notice something really nice about another person, that is also a reflection of you. Congratulate yourself for having such a wonderful trait.
When we change the way we talk to ourselves it changes how the rest of the world responds to us. When we love ourselves, what others say and think doesn’t matter. Loving yourself is not about being conceited. It’s about having respect for yourself.
You’re a great person. Be kind to yourself.